“The One” is something many people, including maybe myself, believe in. It’s the concept that there is one person that’s meant for you. It’s the plot line of countless stories – movies, TV, books, songs. It’s the idea that for everybody, there is someone – the one – who will complete their life.

But that logic is somewhat flawed. Romanticized by our peers, the entertainment world, the world’s greatest poets, finding the one doesn’t really “complete” you because that would mean you’re not whole. On one hand, yeah maybe life would be better if spent with someone special. On the other hand, it’s highly possible that life could still be amazing even if you’re not in a committed romantic relationship – there are countless other reasons to live life for.

But anyway, I went on a tangent. My point here, really, is to describe the many different men you’ll probably encounter in your search for “the one” – some I’ve encountered myself, others I’ve observed in other people in my life. Go figure.

The Puppy Love (a.k.a. Probably Your First Boyfriend)

This is the guy you meet in your youth. I’m not even talking about sandbox love – this could be the guy you fall for in high school or college. In our teenage years, we think we have it all figured out. We’ve all heard that speech before (I know I have). It’s always a version of, “That’s just puppy love. Some day when you’re older, you’ll look back at this relationship and laugh at how silly things were.” And they’re right! I looked back at my college romance (and teenage infatuations), and often laugh. It wasn’t bad, but it’s all pretty juvenile and quite surface-level if you think about it. But these romances prepare you for what’s to come later in life. Puppy love kind of molds you into who you are as someone’s significant other.

The One Your Friend Will Betray You For (a.k.a. Brad Pitt)

It could be a boyfriend, it could be a prospective guy you might want to ask out or ask you out. It’s the guy you’re absolutely head over heels for. The guy you tell your best or closest friend(s) about, because he’s so dreamy and amazing. Well, you keep talking about all his impressive qualities, you end up making your friend(s) want him too. We should be hoes over bros, but this guy will definitely test your friendship(s).

The One You Were Sure Liked You Back (a.k.a. Captain Hook)

We’ve all been there. There’s the guy you thought the world of, maybe he flirted with you a little bit. And then all of a sudden, maybe you even denied it at one point, you end up having a crush. You become obsessed with this person. People say we only see what we want to (or are ready to) see. In this case, every little word or action, we’ll perceive as flirtation. But he never asks you out. Or you ask him out and he’ll reject you… nicely… like that teacup pig episode in How I Met Your Mother (you know the one… “You’re sweet, but I just can’t be with you… for now”). Maybe he has you on the hook, maybe on purpose, or maybe not. But you definitely had your hopes up. Your heart’s in the right place, though. I’ll give you that.

The Temporary Fix (a.k.a. The Band Aid)

You could be lonely, you could be in severe peer pressure, you could be experiencing both. Either way, there may or may not be a time when you’d settle temporarily because well, the guy’s there. Or you felt you needed someone because you just got out of a relationship. He might not be your type, or your ideal guy, but he’s… there. So you think, “Eh, what the hell, why not?” Maybe you’d be with him for a month, maybe you’d be with him for years, but deep down, deep in the chasms of your soul, you know he’s not the one you’d spend the rest of your life with. A bandaid solution. A strip of bandaid you won’t pull because it might hurt, so you just kind of wait for the adhesive to fall off on its own.

The One Night Stand (a.k.a. Mr. Right Now)

Ah, the classic, a staple in most Hollywood chick flicks: the complete stranger you meet some place and… bang. Let’s not get into detail, but this is the guy you, uhm, spend the night with, and then never see again. Maybe you’re alone, lonely, desperate, horny, or some combination of the above. Maybe it was on purpose, maybe it wasn’t. Maybe you’ve had one, maybe you’ve had none, maybe you’ve even had several. But this is the guy who was there just to “pass the time,” so to speak. If you had one (or a few), good for you. Get it, gurrrl (or boiii)! If not, don’t pressure yourself – it’s not for everybody.

The False Mr. Perfect (a.k.a. The One You Can’t Force Yourself to Like)

Of all the proverbial fish in the sea, this guy ticks off everything in your little checklist. All, that is, except one thing: attraction. There’s nothing wrong with him, he might even be perfect. He’s smart, sensible, and in many ways, attractive. Just not for you. Call it a lack of chemistry, but no matter how hard you try to convince yourself how great he is, he just doesn’t do it for you. Maybe you should introduce him to one of your single friends?

The Player (a.k.a. The Fuccboi)

There’s a reason this guy exists as a stereotype in Hollywood – we’ve all come across some version of this dude. He doesn’t even have to be attractive – some of the worst (or best?) players out there aren’t even worthy of the name if you ask me. And yet… To be fair, not all “players” come in the same package. Some of them disguise themselves as one of the good guys, until he either outs himself or gets outed by someone you know. It’s a small world, and we’re women, so we find out one way or another. Ladies, amirite?

The One That Got Away (a.k.a. The Almost Mr. Right)

Another classic Hollywood stereotype (hell, Katy Perry even made a song about him), your Almost Mr. Right disappears for lord knows what reason. Maybe he ghosted. Maybe you broke up and it broke your heart. Maybe the Universe took him away from you in some form or another. But no matter what happens, he was almost the one, and even though you’re now extremely happy, he pops into your head once in a while and still think of him fondly.

The Red Herring (a.k.a. Good Luck Chuck)

This is the guy you were 101% sure was the one, but he’s not. This guy is different from your TOTGA in the sense that he didn’t really go away – you decided or realized that he wasn’t your forever. Just like in the movies, he is the false conclusion you’ve had before the plot twist bites you in the ass. This is the Chris Pratt to your Anne Hathaway in “Bride Wars,” when you’re really going to end up with Bryan Greenberg (yeah, Google him if you must, then thank me later). Your “Good Luck Chuck” even – the guy you date and he seals the deal that you just know you’re ready to settle down… just not with him. I’ve seen some people who have been together for ages, only to find them ending up with someone else and marrying those other people in a much shorter time span than that of the previous relationship. Mother of all plot twists, I know! Interesting how life does that, huh?

…and Then You Find Him

You might date two, five, or all of these guys. Sometimes, men are some combination of them. But regardless, eventually you will find the right one. The One. Your forever. Your Mr. Right. Your Prince Charming. Or whatever the hell you call him. Sometimes, you find him, lose him, and then find him again. Or he finds you. However which way, this bizarre Universe will align and make you two meet. And you will just know.